My New years resolutions

I want this year to be a year of transformation. I want to change some things about myself. I like me but there are certain things I can def change and improve on. Here is my list in no particular order

#1: Change spending habits! I am already doing 'Do I Need this Want?', trying to make a change to where I only buy the things I need, cut out my impulse and frivoluous spending. I want to save money and get a nest egg going for me and Terra to put down on a house/go on a awesome vacation/emergencies etc..

#2: Quit smoking! I havent had a cig since new years eve and I am doing ok now. I want to keep with it. I am getting too old to be smoking because if I stop now I can undo the damage. I dont want my kids to smoke when we have them and quiting now will help with that. I want to be healthy, which leads to my next resolution..

#3: The classic: Lose weight! I am sick and tired of being over weight. I am not wanting to be super model thin. I want to be average, healthy. I want to feel different, more confident and sexy. I want to LOVE my body not just deal with it. Me and my wife have struck a deal. I will give myself a year to lose the weight I want. I will give it my best effort, exercise and dieting. If I dont get where I want to be and it is a fail then we will persue other avenues. I ssssoooooo want the surgery in Mexico (Gastric Sleeve) but I dont have $5000 to get it. So I am going to try it the old fashioned way!

#4: I want to crack open my shell/hidden side. I feel that people have this outer covering to them that hides their emotions and vunerablilities. In my opinion artist have conciously shed that part of themselves to be more in touch with thier creative side and emotions. I want to explore the side of myself that I keep hidden like the dark side of them moon. I want to crack that part of me open and look at it. This sounds like a scary prospect to me because I am not sure I will like what I find. I dont know if I can deal with having my emotions, feelings and vunerabilities so close to the surface, but I know I have to do this if I want to to delve into my creative/hidden side. I am constantly in a state of contemplation and self exploration and I truly feel exploring the parts of myself I keep hidden will bring me closer to alot of things.

I also want to be the best possible spouse I can be to my wife :) Hopefully it will be legal here in Washington soon!!

What are your new years resolutions??
xoxoxox- Emma Jean